


What Rhymes with 'Tsundere'

by SumDumMuffin



Category: Hololive, Hololive En, holoMyth
Genre: F/F, Rap Music, Supernatural Elements, Tsunderes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:15:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26921983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SumDumMuffin/pseuds/SumDumMuffin
Summary: In which Calliope is forced to defend Kiara in order to win a rap battle.
Relationships: Takanashi Kiara/Mori Calliope
Comments: 8
Kudos: 226





	What Rhymes with 'Tsundere'

**Author's Note:**

> [#TAKAMORI](https://twitter.com/hashtag/TAKAMORI?src=hashtag_click)
> 
> EDIT: minor corrections. And Kiara mentioned in a recent stream that she doesn't actually like alcohol, so woo accidental canon compliance!

Calliope Mori panted into the mic right after she finished, sweating under the glare of the spotlight, on the stage at her usual nighttime bar. And after two seconds the applause came, and it was louder than that her opponent had received, and then the MC declared her the winner. 

She shook her opponent's hand and the MC’s hand and she bowed and thanked the audience in both English and Japanese walked off the stage at the back, and she wondered if maybe, possibly, she could just duck out of the venue without Kiara seeing her- 

But the bird was there, blocking the back door. 

“Heyyy~~,” Kiara said. She moved in for a hug but Calliope dodged. 

“That was amazing!” Kiara continued, unphased, “And you won- congrats!” 

“Um,” Callie was very bad at eye contact when around her oldest, well, enemy technically, but an enemy for enough eternities that it made her a sort of, maybe, friend-adjacent type person. Shut up. “Thanks.”

“Do you want to grab a booth and I’ll tell you what I thought?”

Calliope rubbed the back of her head. “I- uh, I did say that, when I invited you, didn’t, I…” 

So Kiara led the way to one of the corner booths. Kiara eagerly patted the seat next to her, but Calliope mushed her lips together and looked at the wall as she took the seat across from her. 

“I thought it was very awesome!” Kiara said, excitedly, in that slight accent of hers. “Your lyrics flowed very well, and when you sung twice as fast in the middle there- just, ah~~,” She theatrically clutched her heart,” Amazing.” 

Callie took a breath. Yeah, she could be professional about this. She refreshed her smile. "Thank you-” 

“And you were sexy as always~” 

“Ehhhh…” Calliope grimaced, “I mean, i guess?” 

“Heheheh,” Kiara said mischievously, “You always were bad at taking compliments.” 

“I- no I'm not,” Calliope said. She folded her arms and closed her eyes. “Thank you for appreciating me and I value your input." She opened her eyes. "-wait-” 

Kiara chuckled mischievously, and then cleared her throat. “Anyway, I’ll get to the grammar corrections, then."

“Oh. Yes.” Calliope pulled out her notepad, and turned to a page that wasn’t covered in practice phrases and word association chains. 

Kiara nodded. “In your first verse you said _'Kono su no koto'_ when really it should just be _'Kono su koto.'_ ” 

“Okay, yeah,” the reaper wrote that down. “Why is that, by the way, do you know?”

Kiara shrugged. “That’s just how the grammar works. Like how in both your lines in the second verse, you pronounced the final words the English way, but Japanese doesn't have diphthongs-” 

“Oh!” the rapper smacked her forehead, “Yeah- I knew that- I just, forgot in the moment.” 

“No, its fine!” Kiara leaned forward and rested her hand on Calliope’s. “For what it’s worth I don’t think anyone really minds that your lines in your second language aren't always grammatically correct.” 

Callie scrunched her mouth and very pointedly pulled her hand out of the phoenix’s. “Well, I hope so, but I still want to get better, you know?” 

“And it is very impressive that you can rap in two languages." Kiara smiled. "It must make coming up with rhymes a lot easier, huh?"

Calliope rubbed the back of her head and looked at the wall. “I- well, sometimes.” 

“My last note is, when you talked about me in the third verse, you mispronounced ‘Kawaii’ as 'Kowai', which means ‘scary’.” 

“No no, that was deliberate,” Calliope said. And she cleared her throat and she started standing up, “Anyway-” 

“And speaking of~~” Kiara lidded her eyes, teasingly, “It was so chivalrous of you to defend my honor on stage there, in front of everybody~”

Callie huffed and broke eye contact. “N- _no~_ , that- all this was-” she cleared her throat, ”The actual moral of this story is that the one time I invite you to one of my rap battles you almost make me lose because my opponent sees you order a glass of milk.” She folded her arms and nodded in victory. 

Kiara smiled. “What? It’s a good drink.” She fluttered her eyelids, “But that’s besides the point~”

“I just wanted to win the rap battle, okay? Don’t read into it.” Callie felt her face heat up. 

“Well, you say that, but I can’t help but think you had a whole verse dedicated to- admittedly mostly backhanded compliments- about me, all because you secretly love me.” 

“I- nooo~,” Callie huffed, “That was just- I mean, there’s so many legitimate reasons why you’re dumb and bad,” Callie managed to say, “Ordering milk at a bar isn’t a real indictment of your character, so I took offense to that." 

Kiara hid her mouth behind her fingertips. “Heehee, are you sure it’s not because you care about me very much?”

“Lies,” Callie huffed, “I mean it. This is slander.” 

“C'mon, you lovvvvee mee~~”

“Slander, I say.” 

“Okay, sure.” Kiara said. She stood up, to leave. “Well, thank you for inviting me, I enjoyed it very much!" 

Calliope escorted her out, and right before they both reached the exit, Callie stopped and took a breath. 

“So, I’m, doing this again next week, at this same place,” Calliope said. 

“Ooo-" Kiara's face lit up, metaphorically, "Yes, I will definitely be here!” 

And when Calliope’s guard was down, Kiara ducked into her personal space and planted a soft smooch on her cheek.

It felt warm where Kiara had pressed her lips, and Calliope idly touched her face as her Shinigami equivalent of a heart skipped a beat in a way you could lay a track over- 

And then her brain re-activated. 

“AH! No, gross!” Calliope sputtered and rubbed her cheek with the cloth on her wrist. 

“Ahahahah-” Kiara cackled as she left the building- 

Calliope followed her oldest enemy into the alleyways. She summoned her scythe as she ran and on the third swing managed to slay the bird right in the stomach. She had some killer rhymes on standby, in case the scythe didn’t work this time. 

As Kiara’s phoenix body started turning to ash, and her face lit up, supernaturally, she winked at her long-term repeat murderer. “I’ll be sure to rebirth by next week, don’t worry.” 

Calliope scrunched her mouth at the wall. “I mean, sure. Whatever.” 


End file.
